The bartender, backlit by the Carslberg clock over his shoulder, looks up from his paper.
Naw, TonyO ain’t been in. Not for a week or more.
His old man owns the place.
Yeah.
Maybe he’s around then.
Nope.
Grig’s screwing up his nerve. A place like this, the guy gets hit for drinks a dozen times a day.
Say friend . . .
Don’t start partner.
You ain’t even heard me ask.
I know the delivery so save it.
How about some soda water, just some soda water and I’ll sit back by the pool table, just in case he shows up.
The bartender, his eyes on Grig the whole time, grabs a rocks glass, fills it at the slop-sink.
Come on friend. From the gun how bout?
You want it or don’t you?
Fine, yeah fine.
The cripples at the bar don’t move, don’t acknowledge the exchange. Grig hunts for some sympathy. Someone who may be in a buying mood.
Don’t sit at the bar.
No sir. No sir. Back by the table. If TonyO or his old man comes in could you tell them I’m here?
First thing partner.

It’s a rainy night. It’s rainy.

It’s clear as a bell dumb-ass.

In here! In here. It’s raining in here. And mighty nice it is.

Okay man. Okay.

Soft ferns. Mud. It smells like life. Life!

Sure. Is there any more General Tso’s?

Five minutes.

Five minutes. Every five minutes you say five minutes you gob-eyed motherfucker. Grey eggs. Those shitty mini custards. Steak fries. But how often do you put out General Tso’s? You never put out General Tso’s.

It’s out. Five minutes.

Fuck you.

Yes.

So what happened to you anyway?

What do you mean?

I mean your legs. I mean what happened?

The fuck you think? The fucking war. The war that wasn’t never a war. A radio shack car. Some RDX. We took a corner too tight. Boom and that’s that. It’s fun to set off the metal detectors in airports.

I thought you hated flying.

I do, but I love setting off metal detectors.

I’ll be back in a minute.

Don’t say minute.

Don’t say minute?

No, say moment.

Moment.

Because a minute is, you know, a minute.

They’ll think it’s a minute.

But it could be longer than a minute.

A moment is longer? A moment sounds shorter.

What’s a moment?

I don’t know. A moment is . . . I don’t know.

Exactly. Who knows what a moment is. If you say minute, people start counting to sixty. You say moment, and they go back to their crossword puzzle.

How’d you figure this out?

Because I figured it.

You’re a genius.

I’m not a genius. It’s just common sense. Extrapolation.

Extrapolation.

Yeah, taking an idea and extending—

I know what extrapolation means.

Okay, I just figured—

More figuring, huh?

I just figured that maybe you didn’t.